I'm sorry to welcome you to our exclusive club. But hey, since we are exclusive, that must mean you're "special" -- right?! :)
What should I ask my neurologist when I finally see him? What should I expect as far as a treatment plan?
This depends on you, your insurance, your doctor, and some other factors. But in general, it's likely your neurologist will want to put you on a Disease Modifying Therapy (DMT). This is often a drug to suppress your immune system. That makes you more susceptible to everything from common colds to cancer, but it works to stop your immune system from attacking your brain and causing MS attacks which produce "lesions" (aka literal "brain damage").
This is all heavy-duty stuff, eh? If you're "only" very unsettled you're doing better than I was immediately after my diagnosis. :)
I'd recommend watching some YouTube videos and educating yourself about MS. But be careful about YouTube videos: Some are great, informative and useful. Some suggest alternative treatments which may be good or bad. Many are from MS patients themselves of varying qualities. But some are from flat-out crackpots or sleazeballs looking to scam sick people out of money.
(a mainstream MS-specialist neurologist in Ohio, Dr. Aaron Boster, who likes making YouTube videos) has a bunch of great advice about various drugs and MS in general -- highly recommended.
He's got a video specifically for newly diagnosed patients that I'm pretty sure you'll find interesting and reassuring. And there are a wealth of other tips and information that you're likely to be interested in.
And if you want some other recommendations, just let me know. (I don't want to toss too much at you at once.)
Should I look for a doctor who specializes in MS?
All neurologists have some knowledge about MS, but yes, you'll want to find one that has a decent number of MS patients and some distinct experience with the disease. And also one you can talk/relate to/with. MS is highly individualistic -- though there are common or general things, each person's disease is different. Some doctors don't seem to grasp that.
What is your best advise for my first MS appointment?
Umm, beats me. :) For me that was 30+ years ago and I was in sort of a deer-caught-in-headlights mode.
To close and summarize this message, a thought: So you've just been handed a life-altering medical diagnosis, right?
Heavy-duty stuff! Take this time to rethink life. And if need be, change and alter things. I mean from the way you think to the what you're doing in life.
You just got a big incentive to revamp your life and focus on health -- everything from exercise to eating healthy to reducing/finding healthy ways of dealing with stress to paying more attention to your mental health...to everything.
Most people never have that opportunity -- they're bogged down in the daily grind of life and many tend to stay there. But since you have had this earthquake of a diagnosis, spin it as a positive and use it (it beats the heck out of viewing it entirely as a negative, trust me:).