Hello, I was diagnosed on 11/9/17. hadn't been feeling well for month or now that I think about it more like years. I thought I was going crazy. My legs were always hurting and they felt heavy. I was so tired all the time. I would describe it as I feel as if some one just unplugged me and I have no more energy. If I was to close my eyes I would fall over. BUT, no one listen so I kept going. Im a mother of 5 kids so I had no choice to keep on ignoring what my body was trying to tell me. One month I had a terrible headache kind of like a bad migraine that would not go away. But kept working, had no choice, my husband would say take a pain pill n quit thinking about it. Until that life turning moment, I was at work and I kept dropping everything, tripping over my feet, my headache became worse. Then my left eye started getting real blurry, I felt my face go numb, and I was having trouble forming my words. I got real scared called my supervisor and told her I think I'm having a stroke. Look at my face. Does it look droopy, listen to my speech it sounds weird. She told me ok well finish your shift and then call staffing supervisor to see if she lets u go home. Long storry short I got written up but I left and went to emergency room. I was dizzy, having trouble walking, and my headache was terrible, and my legs hurt but felt numb and heavy. Had CT scan lots of blood work and was sent home with a migrane diagnosis n a note for work. Finally my doctor fought for referred me to neurologist had MRI it came back covered in lessions. I was asked to go to be admitted to hospital to run more tests blood, more scans of my body. Stool sample, and a spinal tap. Doctors told me they thought it could be brain cancer but were trying to rule out other things. My brain was slightly swollen which could why my head hurt. I was finally discharged pending results. Finally came the result I HAD MS. I told them ok so no brain cancer, just MS. OK, I was relieved it wasnt brain cancer, it had a name all the things I was feeling, and all my pain had a name. I thought well give me meds and let me go back to work. NOPE that day changed my life FOREVER the way people looked at me, the way my husband started to behave towards me. I get it no one signs up for this unpredictable illness not know what next, when will the next relapse will happen, and the now whats wrong attitude. So I became sad, angry, I felt alone, cheated, sick and not knowing what will happen. So I stopped saying how I was feeling, what was I feeling, how my eye both were blurry, how scared I was, how much I was hurting physically and emotionally. I though why i never did drugs, never smoked, dont drink and alway worked and this is my payment. Until I had another relapse and experience complete weakness in my legs and I couldn't walk. So I started praying, and being thankful and greatful for the little things, and all that love my kids were giving me. I was so afraid so mad n so much pain I didn't see that my kids were afraid for me, afraid something bad was happening to their mom. I started going to physical therapy and slowly began to walk again. My gait will never be the same its been over a year that it happened and I have more relapses but my 5 super heros give me strength to face tomorrow. Yes its hard I have cruel heartlessness coworkers how talk bad about my fake MS n other have ridiculed my walk, made fun of it.. BUT I have to work. I am now a single mom. I guess my husband to become ill with selective hearing, vision and memory loss as he has moved on to partying and living a happy life AWAY from MS.
MS takes away from us but it also gives us insight to our inner strength and appreciation for the little things. No one has tomorrow promised to them. And this what I leave you with our tomorrows are not promised to us. So, let's be thankful we can still feel our kids hugs N kisses, thier voices saying "I love you mommy" and we are stronger then we often realize.
I am so sorry to hear all of this - it must be really difficult. If you need to speak to an MS Navigator because you have questions or just need some emotional support, please call 1-800-344-4867. We are available Monday through Friday and can help with employment, benefits or other related issues.
Also, you can find local support groups here if you feel connecting with others living with MS and discussing your concerns might be helpful:Find a Support Group
You brought me to tears. Your strength and courage is remarkable. As a mom of three, I can completely relate ( and wonder how you do it).
Are you on meds my friend? We need you in top shape ... you got stuff to do!
Love and many Gods blessings to you. You are strong and amazing.
You have my admiration!!! It takes so much out of you. I don't know where to begin it's a horrific disease I've had it for years aa well as those headaches to the falls I've been doing this juggling act with this disease forever and it's been so hard and I'm a guy with just my 4 dogs. And let me tell you I can't even keep up with myself most days without a struggle and then it's usually with help from my nephew or sister. The hardest thing is to be alone with this it's like nature is playing a sick game on us and or it's just a bad dream that we keep telling are shelves that we are going to wake up from. Don't let anyone try and make you feel bad about anything and if they don't understand what you go through tell them to look up this website. "How ms feels.com" and that should help. Welcome to the forum and hope that we hear from you again.