I am a RN in the ER for 20 years but in 2017 I had to step away from the bedside. I am now at a desk job as an RN. My diagnosis came in 2008 but my doctors feel my symptoms started back in my early 20's.I am not a complainer and being a nurse I just thought all my symptoms were all in my head. Until that one day that everything wasn't fine anymore. I woke up and literally fell out of bed. I couldn't stand up my legs were numb and my muscles wouldn't hold me up. I'm a single mom and still work full time at night as a nurse for 12 hours. I don't know what I would do if I couldn't work anymore. i wouldn't be able to pay my bills or keep my house. I have two kids, one is 24 and one is 12. I feel like such a failure as a mom. I can't do things and I am tired all the time. I never want to get out of my PJ's. I want to date but who wants to get involved with someone with MS and all that comes with it. I haven't found that person. My family act like I am making my symptoms up or better yet they see me working and doing what needs to be done and don't understand that it takes everything I have to get out of bed and approach my days. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like my kids would be better off without me here. I have so many medical bills and I am drowning.